The Official Newsletter of Country Club & the Porn Horns
June 2003  


June 19, 2003 - Tobacco Road
   355 W. 41st St, NYC (bet. 8th & 9th Aves)

What up Porn Heads!  Check the cover shred shot.  That’s what I call my Rock Animal/God chord!  Riplicious!  Try and have it, go ahead try.  Oh that’s right, you will never.

First things first, we got a show coming up at Tobacco Road on Thursday, June 19th at 8:00 pm.  That’s right... an early show, that means you’ll be in bed hugging your teddy bear by ten, so I don’t want to hear it!

Now check out the article:

Guitar World finally caught up to the fast paced lifestyle of all around rocker, Tempuss Bloodcell (f.k.a. Will Hoffman), of Country Club & the Porn Horns for a candid conversation.  For the first time, the true artistry behind this beautiful and talented rock icon has been revealed.

GW:  From first chair trumpet in a prestigious New England private school to feathered boas, porno and booze.  How do you see your musical evolution?

TB:  It was a very natural progression.  I've always dreamt of merging the two driving forces in my life, that being pornography and music.  The booze just acted as the catalyst.

GW:  So this is how you always pictured it to be?

TB:  Ripping licks and baggin' chicks.  Yep, that was the master plan.

GW:  Let's talk about the band.  Any memorable moments lately?

TB:  Let's see.  We recently played Sully's Pub up in Hartford.

GW:  That's right around where you grew up, right?

TB:  Hell yeah!  Had the fam out representing.  I tell you what, brother, there aint nothing like rocking "Whiskey Tits" to a packed room and seeing your own mother jamming out.  Players killed the sesh at the gig!

GW:  That is something.  So what about the song Whiskey Tits?  It has been getting a lot of attention.  What is the story?

TB:  Let's just say she exists and was last seen at my local Williamsburg watering hole, The Turkey's Nest.  Speaking of the song, we offended our first audience member recently at Galapagos.  She hucked a lemon at the stage when we finished!  I dig that, man.

GW:  Rumors have it you incorporated some aerial maneuvers?

TB:  Sure, there was the climatic scissor kick jump off the drum riser at The Elbow Room a couple weeks ago.  Shredder of a move, I must admit.  I watched lot of Poison videos growing up.

GW:  So what's next for the band?

TB:  Well we've been in the studio a lot lately working on the first CCPH full album.  Under the engineering supervision of Braimy Saltino, the jams are coming out hotter than if you took the body of the chick from that Warrant video and gave her the head of the chick from that Ratt video and then this hot-hybrid super chick made out with the teacher from “Hot For Teacher!”  Now that is hot!  That’s what the jams are like, you know what I'm saying?

GW:  Yes, yes I do.  Anything you'd like to say to your fans out there?  Hopefully both of them are reading?

TB:  Listen up all you mini shredders.  Just remember, a day without Rock N' Roll ain't worth washing your nuts over!

GW:  Alright, you heard it here kids, if you like Rock N' Roll don't wash your nuts.

TB:  No, I'm not saying stop washing your nuts, but only if there's going to not be any Rock N' Roll.

GW:  So don't stop washing your nuts until there's no more Rock N' Roll?

TB:  No man, you don't get it, I'm just saying to the young rippers out there to keep the rock alive.  You know.  Still keep the basement business tidy and fresh, it's good.  Hell, I give mine the once over daily.

GW:  So what does genital hygiene have to do with Rock N Roll again?

TB:  Man, it was just a rock star thing to say, a catch phrase I'm trying out.

GW:  Yeah, not real clear.

TB:  Whatever dude, are we done?

GW:  I'd say you're just about finished.  Thanks for coming by.

Check out the new photos of Country Club & the Porn Horns' May 22nd performance at the Elbow Room in the Photos section of  Be on the lookout for future show announcements and the release of their first album, "Station Wagon Revolution", by the end of the summer.

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